Go to a therapist to repair a friendship? There is relationship counseling and family counseling but what about friendship counseling? I heard on the radio that more people are going to counseling to mend friendships and I've seen this done on TV shows (Always Sunny in Philadelphia and Golden Girls) but I wonder if its really worth it.
People go to marriage/family counseling because there are things at stake, a marriage, a parent/child relationship, that if broken could cause long standing harm. But if I have a problem with a girlfriend do I want to shell out dough to be friends again? I mean isn't there something to the saying about being friends for a season? At what point does a friendship become worth mending?
Well, I venture to say that a friendship is worth working to maintain if the friend was like family or even held the role of family if you are living somewhere with no family (I mean how would those Sex and the City women survive in New York without each other, rarely did you see their family in all 6 seasons, same with Friends).
It's also worth it if you've known each other for a long time. A long time could be decades or a few years but whatever is enough for that person to have been planted long enough in your life to have many long lasting memories and whose presence could not be replaced quickly or easily.
It's worth it if what broke you up was not something serious. If your home girl cheated with your boyfriend, well, I don't care if we've known each other since elementary school; the friendship is dead. But if it was a misunderstanding, an argument, I think it's worth working on. If you'd work on it with your man, then work on it with your girl.
One thing to note is that if a friendship feels like it has run its course, just naturally, then don't force it to stay close or find another way to keep in touch. Sometimes we have friends that we relate to differently. I have friends that I was joined at the hip to in college and we aren't now but I we still connect via Facebook and we might meet up once in a blue moon, maybe with years passing by. I have friends that got married but that doesn't mean I don't invite them out or do different types of outings with them (everyone loves a good brunch!)
In sum, I do think, for the most part, that friendships are worth investing in, even for a therapist. Because like a good man (or woman) they are hard to come by and unlike family, we DID have a choice to have a relationship with them, so we might as well work it out!